Recurring Nightmares
by 8979
Summary: As they take a break from their voyage at sea, Sara starts to have recurrent bad dreams. As Grissom confronts her about it, he finds out there is something she is not telling him. GSR COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

Title: Recurring Nightmares

Rating: M, just to be on the safe side

Disclaimer: All characters are owned by CBS and their creators even the show has finished. But let's face it. It still goes on for us fans, especially GSR.

Some dialogs are taken from episode 13x15 (Forget Me Not)

A/N:

So this is my first time to write a story after a very, very long time (11 years to be exact). My first ones were also published here under another name (but I won't tell what it is because those stories suck). This story has been going on in my mind for quite some time now. And I just couldn't let it go so I decided to finally write this. I figured it would be published just in time for Sara's birth month as it is incorporated in the plot. It took me a while, though, because I have to watch the saddest episode of the entire series over and over again. And it was really hard.

Lastly, this is my first time to write smut (oh yes, there will be smut) so bear with me. Though, I openly accept kind criticisms.

This was not beta'd so I take full responsibility for all mistakes in this chapter. Enjoy!

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" _Nothing happened."_

" _He's setting me up. He set me up at the hotel and he's setting me up now."_

" _He is the one behind this. You know I didn't do this."_

" _You're done, Ronald! This time for real."_

Sara finally opened her eyes, finding it damp from tears that never fell. She carefully wiped her eyes hoping that her actions go unnoticed. Relief flooded through her as she realized she was alone lying on the berth in the cabin of Grissom's boat. From the sound the boat was emitting, the constant vibration she felt on the bed, and the mild waving motion against the sea indicated that they were on the move. She rolled over to her back stretching out her muscles, tensed from maintaining an uncomfortable position from sleep and maybe from the bad dream she just had. She sighed deeply and closing her eyes, remembering the vivid scenes.

' _I guess it's that time of the year again,'_ she thought with dread.

She opened her eyes again and looked around the small compact cabin bathed somehow in soft light emanating from the tinted windows. The cabin of Ishmael offered only little space for both Grissom and her. On one corner held different electronic equipment, gadgets, and their laptops they needed to communicate with the rest of their team and small stacks of folders containing information regarding different missions during their voyage across the sea. The other corner stood a small stove and a sink. At the end of the bed was a simple bathroom designed for their basic necessities. Their baggage and other personal stuff were crammed under the bed.

Actually, Grissom had his berth expanded a bit so it could better accommodate them both. But it did little to the space. But Sara didn't mind, telling him that, "We've spent a lot of nights in spaces a lot smaller than this," adorning that seductive smile that Grissom find so hard to resist and her hands around his neck, remembering those steamy nights spent on a simple cot strong enough to support both their weights in the middle of a hot and humid climate of the rainforest.

Life was actually going great for the couple. It had been almost a year since they reunited and sailed into the seas. Almost a year since he resurfaced in her life after that serendipitous encounter in Las Vegas, not knowing back then that it was her final big case that she would be working on. But she was grateful for this chance. Another chance that was given to them to reassure themselves that they never really stopped loving each other even after several years of being apart.

They got married again weeks after getting back together and has been continuing Grissom's mission as a watcher and protector of the seas under Oceanpeace. Sara met his fellow advocates and she was warmly welcomed by them to the organization. Since then, they journeyed across the oceans catching fishermen and raiding their shipping vessels that go about violating marine laws and became somewhat, as they both amusedly call themselves, CSIs of the sea.

They currently finished multiple 'operations' somewhere in the Pacific near Alaska and Larry, the leader of their team, was so pleased with their consecutive busts that they were given a break from their voyage at sea. Technically, a month of vacation to spend just by themselves. And here they are, Grissom currently navigating their boat to a place unknown to Sara, saying that it was a surprise.

Sara smiled and was pulled out of her reverie as she decided to go greet the subject of her musings. She finally got up, got dressed, and went to meet Grissom at the helm. She found him staring into the distance, steering in a straight direction, a silhouette of a skyline barely visible at a distance. Sara silently walked up to Grissom and wrapped her arms around his waist from behind. He turned his head at his shoulder, a ghost of a smile on his face, and placed a hand on top of hers before looking back ahead.

"I didn't want to wake you up," he greeted.

"It's okay," she replied, "I just missed you in bed."

He smiled at her reply. "I prepared breakfast for you. It's downstairs right by the stove. You should fill yourself up. We got a whole day waiting for us."

Sara leaned her cheek on Grissom's shoulder and continued staring into the nearing horizon blanketed by a few clouds and the brightness of the midmorning sun. "Where are we headed anyway?"

He grinned mischievously. "You'll see soon enough."

After a moment, Sara squinted at the distance and was able to slowly familiarize a certain bridge. "Is that the Golden Gate Bridge?"

Grissom turned to her with a sweet smile on his face, "Welcome back to The Bay, honey."

He was rewarded with her megawatt smile, showing the gap between her two front teeth. Sara put her hands on the side of his face and kissed him with such passion that took his breath away.

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"How long did you plan this?" Sara looked around the car as she was seated at the passenger seat, buckling her seatbelt, still could not hide her elation from being where they are at the moment. She was also thinking Grissom could have not pulled all these off easily as they were nowhere near California for the past few weeks. When they parked Ishmael on the docks, this rented car was already waiting for them at the nearest parking lot as if someone had arranged it for them and knew they were coming.

As Grissom was reversing into the main road, he refused to meet Sara's eyes with a hint of reluctance. But she put her hand on his on the gear and squeezed gently. He glanced at her quickly and replied, "Maybe I was kind of planning something for your birthday."

"But it's not until two weeks from now," she retorted as they drove on forward.

"I know. But it's still your birth month. So…"

"How did you pull this off?"

"Well, aside from being busy with our bust in Alaska, I was working on an extra-curricular at the side."

"I kind of figured that out," she chuckled. "But I was with you. And we were at the ocean."

"I have many connections," he winked at her.

She laughed in agreement. "Yes, you do." Sara slowly shook her head, still in disbelief. "I had no idea."

"Well, it will not be a surprise if you knew it then, won't it?"

She smiled softly at him and squeezed his hand again. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet. We are just getting started."

"Still."

Grissom opened his hand and laced his fingers with hers, offering a small sweet smile, saying nothing.

Then Sara turned back to the road, looked around the familiar buildings and landmarks. "So, what hotel are we staying at?"

Grissom slightly tensed at her question but recovered instantly. "Well, we are not staying at a hotel."

Sara turned to him with a confused look, "Then where?"

"You'll see," Grissom replied, kissing her hand, hinting no more.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you for the positive feedback and messages. I really appreciate it! So sorry this chapter is too short but I promise I'll make it up to you in the next. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Still belongs to CBS and its creators

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After half an hour of driving through steep streets and famous landmarks around the city, they arrived at what seemed an affluent neighborhood and Grissom slowed down. He took a few more turns until finally parking into a driveway of a cream-colored two-storey single-detached home with an unmaintained small front lawn and red-bricked walkway leading to a small porch. Sara had not noticed her mouth was open until Grissom called out her attention.

"We're here."

They got out of the car and Grissom gave Sara the keys to the house while he unloaded the trunk of their baggage. As Sara opened the front door, she was more surprised at the interior of the house. With mouth agape, she removed her jacket and slowly padded through the hardwood floors. Wooden stairs covered with lush red carpet was situated to her right leading upstairs. The entry foyer led to the living room with a wood-burning fireplace, fully furnished with two soft couches facing each other and a wooden center table in the middle. Another set of stairs was fixed in a narrow space beside the fireplace. Two large bookshelves fully occupied with books of different sizes and thickness were situated side-by-side on one side of the room nearest to her. The opposite side were sliding glass doors leading to a patio and small garden outside. The room was brightly illuminated by the light outside bouncing off the cream-colored walls and ceiling giving it a more spacious look.

She put her jacket on the armrest of one couch and headed first to the kitchen to her left which she found that the countertop and the large center island were all made of granite. At the far end of the kitchen was a breakfast area with another glass door opening to the garden. There was a separate dining room beside the kitchen with a large wooden table and chairs that could accommodate at least four people. She continued her own tour outside and was greeted by a small garden with an unkempt lawn but showing potential if given the proper attention.

Sara finished her tour of the ground level of the house and found a bathroom (the smallest in the house, she presumed), laundry room, and a storage area at the other rooms. A solitary door led to the basement which she has yet to explore. She returned to the living room where Grissom laid their baggage at the side of the couch and put his jacket alongside hers at the armrest.

"Whose house is this, Gil? This place is to die for! And I haven't even checked out the rooms upstairs yet!" she exclaimed.

He turned to her, a nervous smile on his face, seeming uncertain. "What do you think of the house?"

"Are we going to rent this for the whole month? This must have cost a fortune." She again gave the whole room a quick glance, her eyes reflecting back wonder with mouth slightly opened wide. "I mean, this is incredible!"

Grissom nodded, appearing satisfied with Sara's reaction but reluctant to meet her eyes. She noticed his reticence and quickly inferred that there was something he wasn't telling her. And she was sure it was about the house.

"Gil?" she pressed on, "Whose house is this?"

Sighing deeply in surrender, he returned her serious but soft gaze, and answered, "It's yours, Sara."


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: First of all, I want to thank you for all the positive reviews I have gotten so far. It really warms my heart that you like the story. Sadly, I can't seem to reply to your comments. Might be a problem with the site or something. But I truly appreciate your kind words.

This is to make up for the brevity of the previous chapter. Also, this chapter is where it got its rating. To celebrate the anniversary of the series finale, we all deserve a GSR smut. But mind you, this is my first time writing one so please bear with me. I accept your thoughts about it so comment away or send me a message. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Still not mine but grateful to the creators

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A little baffled at what she just heard, Sara questioned Grissom, "What do you mean it's mine?"

Still with hesitation in his eyes, he explained, "It was supposed to be an anniversary gift. From years ago. He shrugged. "I bought this, planned to get you here but obviously didn't have a chance to. Then…we split up." He bowed his head, "But I couldn't let this go."

Grissom lifted his eyes, met Sara's gaze, and found tears at the brink of her eyes. He walked closer to her.

"I thought in the back of my mind that someday, somehow, I may finally be able to show you this." He stopped in front of her, his own eyes narrowing with a little hint of sorrow shown in his features.

She said nothing and he continued.

"I finished paying for it about three years ago. I've kept it under your name." He stopped and corrected himself. "Well, our names." Grissom put his hands at Sara's arms and caressed gently. "So…it's yours." He smiled hesitantly.

Sara could not stop the tears from falling but let them be. She smiled, reassuring him that at least she was not against the idea. "But why a house, Gil? We're always at sea. I mean, even this break is temporary."

Grissom glided his hands across the smooth expanse of her neck until it rested on each side of her face. "I just thought maybe in the future you would need some place to finally settle down at. At least, there is a home waiting for you here." He wiped her tears with his thumbs. "And I also thought San Francisco. Well, it's a favorite place of yours."

"It's where I met you," she smiled warmly.

He returned the smile and kissed her softly on the lips, tasting salt and sweet at the same time. He pulled back and looked around the place, "So, what do you think?"

She put her arms around his neck and gave him a coquettish grin, "I think the bed needs to be christened."

He narrowed his eyes and Sara observed the immediate darkening of his cerulean orbs. Without any more hesitation, Grissom's hand tangled through her hair and the other wrapping Sara around her waist, pulling her closer to him, and kissed her gently but with such passion she held her breath for a moment.

He pulled back first and looked into her eyes, now mixed with want and lust, "I love you, Sara."

She didn't have a chance to answer back since his lips were immediately back on hers with such force that she eventually parted her lips and welcomed his exploring tongue. Her knees buckled and she entangled her hands around his neck and shoulders and her fingers gripped his soft curls for support. She thought that he tasted exquisite as their tongues battled for dominance. He sucked her bottom lip, eliciting a moan that produced heat in her belly and she felt damp between her thighs. He started walking backwards without breaking their kiss.

Several pieces of clothing were discarded as they struggled up the stairs without breaking any skin contact as much as possible, leaving Sara in her bra and panties while Grissom still had a tee shirt and his boxers on, his erection very evident through the fabric. When they pulled back and gasped for air, they found themselves outside the door to their bedroom. Grissom leaned his forehead against hers and softly smiled. He then held her hands and led her inside. He pulled down the sheets then stood before her and gazed deeply into Sara's eyes.

Then Grissom put his hands around her waist and relished the feel of her skin against his rough hands. He leaned into her neck and nipped and licked at her freckled slightly tanned skin. He continued this slow sensual movement until he sucked at her pulse point and Sara could not bite back the moan threatening to escape her throat. Her eyes rolled at the erotic feeling and curled her hands against the hair at Grissom's nape. He then unhooked her bra and slid her out of it before turning his attention to her breasts, his mouth licking and sucking a nipple while a hand caresses the other. He gave equal attention to each of her breasts, leaving no part of skin untouched. Sara arched her back to him and rubbed her hips against him, grinding against his erection. He let out a low growl and reluctantly pulled back from her.

He slowly laid her against the bed and straddled her hips. He put a finger around the waistband of her panties and pulled it down. Grissom then undressed himself of his shirt while Sara sat up, both hands at the side of his hips and got rid of his boxers, finally freeing his erection. She wrapped her fingers around his raging hard-on which elicited a groan from him and she started pumping against her hands. He rolled his head back and closed his eyes, struggling to keep in control. He called out her name, barely a whisper. She then exchanged her hands with her mouth while her hands went to caress his balls. She did it slowly at first and when she started to speed up, he tangled his fingers through Sara's hair, fighting against every urge not to buck his hips into her mouth. When he thought that he was nearing the edge, he suddenly pulled back from her with a loud moan.

Then their eyes met, wild, alive, and passionate. She licked her lips, glistening with his lingering juice, and Grissom suddenly leaned down on her and kissed her on the lips, tasting a little bit of him mixed with her sweetness, laying her back down on the bed. Then he continued to lavish her with kisses down her jaw, neck, and behind her ears. A hand groped around a breast, rubbing his thumb around a pert nipple while the other hand proceeded downward to the space between her thighs. He smiled against her salty skin as he found her wet and ready. He carried on the kisses from her collarbone down to her breastbone and abdomen, her arousal heightening even more with the rough feel of his stubble scraping against her flushed skin. When he dipped his tongue into her navel, she writhed under him and breathed his name.

"Gil."

Grissom parted her leg with his knee and crawled downwards. Without warning, he inhaled her scent and cupped her fleshy mound with his hand. Parting her lips with his fingers, he delved his tongue in, tasting her arousal. He then slipped a finger through her slick, wet folds and started pumping through her. Her body shuddered under him and she grasped the sheets tightly at her side. He added a second finger and started to build up a rhythm and Sara rocked against his fingers. Moaning with pleasure, her head rolled back against the pillows and she tangled her fingers through his hair. When he sucked on her hard, sensitive nub, he started to feel her muscles clamping tightly around his fingers followed by her whole body trembling.

He slowed down his movement as she was coming down from orgasm. When she regained her normal breathing, she looked up at him and he went back up and kissed her on her lips. As their tongues dueled for some time, he hovered above her and positioned himself at her entrance, sliding against her wetness but not completely penetrating.

"I want you, Gil. I need you," Sara pleaded.

Seeing her own need that matched with his, he finally slid into her and felt deep satisfaction once he was enclosed in her heat. He started to set up a rhythm and rocked against her while kissing and sucking the soft expanse of skin on her neck and shoulder. When they reached a speed that were both familiar to them, Sara rocked her hips upward meeting Grissom's thrusts, the sound of their pounding hips together with their incoherent grunts and moans echoed around the room. They started to lose their rhythm as Sara was nearing her climax. She dug her nails into Grissom's back, feeling his muscles tense with each movement, drawing out a hiss from him. And as he felt her muscles clenching around him, he was thrown over the edge by his own orgasm. He buried his face into her neck as he pounded hard into her and muttered out her name.

As he pulled out of her and rolled onto his back, Grissom carried Sara with her, refusing to break any contact. She looked up at him kissed his temples covered in a thin sheen of sweat.

"I love you, Gilbert," finally muttering the words she wanted to say early on with a lilt of her voice that he had grown to love.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thank you for following the story, guys! Now we go to the main plot…

To ninthwardgurl05, the answer to your question is in this chapter.

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: They're not mine. If they were, GSR would have taken a better route than what was in the series.

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Sara woke up to a dreamless sleep, making her feel energized and satiated. This was the first time in days that she had not woken up with a pounding in her chest or in cold sweat. The last thing she wanted to happen was a nightmare waking not only her, but also Grissom, that would eventually lead to a series of questions she doesn't like to answer at the moment. Or ever.

The days passed with Grissom and Sara spending their time refurnishing the house with their own touches. They bought additional furniture, put up photos of them and their framed collection of butterflies around the house, worked the lawn, and planted shrubs and small plants that attracted different kinds of insects and butterflies. You would think that after working a few years in the ocean around magnificent sea creatures that Grissom's fascination about insects would waver. But no, Sara found it amusing that he still loved his bugs.

He introduced her to Mike and Christine, a young couple also working for Oceanpeace, who were based in the West Coast and currently residing in San Francisco. They were the ones who helped Grissom maintain the house while he was away and provided the rental car that waited for them at the docks on their first day at the city. The couple were eventually invited for dinner at their home as a sign of their gratitude and, at the same time, bond as friends who share the same advocacy.

Of course, being workaholics even before, Grissom and Sara were still active in their organization even on land. They helped intercept those shipping vessels and illegal operations, providing useful information to their team members who are currently active at sea. In addition, they were given the task to help Mike and Christine gather data regarding different marine sanctuaries situated in California. These took most of their time but did not really bother them at all since they loved what they do.

Sara was really happy and content. Even the nightmares that have been bothering her had ceased and she was really grateful.

Or so she thought.

A week after they settled into their new home, the bad dreams started again. Every now and then, Sara would wake up in cold sweat, her breathing erratic, with constricting pain in her chest. And worse, Grissom has been noticing it, too. They even got into a minor argument about it.

One time as they finished their lunch, Sara stood up and gathered the used dishes and cutlery, placed the utensils on the sink, with Grissom following behind her. She washed the dishes while he wiped them dry as she passed them to him before putting it on the dish rack.

Grissom took this opportunity to confront her about her recurring unpleasant dreams.

"Honey, are you alright?"

"Yeah," Sara answered, surprised by his question. "Why would I not be?"

"Well, you seem to be having frequent nightmares these past few weeks."

' _Weeks?'_ she thought. _'Then he must have noticed it back then.'_

"I thought maybe something is bothering you," he continued.

She answered him, concentrating on her task, "It's nothing. Just the usual cases that bothered me every now and then."

He looked at her. "But they're not your usual bad dreams, Sara. This happens almost every night."

She was starting to get pissed at him. She stopped in the middle of her chore and looked at him sharply. "And what do you know about my usual dreams, Gil?" she challenged him.

His look softened. "It's just… you're always mumbling something while you're asleep. You're always shaking and on the verge of tears every time I wake you up. I just…" He bowed his head and stared at the cloth on his hand. "I didn't want _that_ to happen again."

Sara finally understood his worries. He was thinking of her dark days when they were still in Vegas several years ago. She had the same kind of bad dreams every night, the ghosts of her past coming back to haunt her. But he was not there to comfort her when that happened since they worked in different shifts. She refused to open up to him before and kept it all bottled up inside. Afraid that he might witness her breakdown and come to despise her for it, she left.

Now Grissom is afraid that history will repeat itself just because they find themselves in the same circumstances at the moment. But to Sara, this was different. He was here.

Sara turned off the tap, wiped her hands on the dishcloth, and turned to him. She put a hand on his cheek, the other on his arm, and shifted him to face her.

"Honey," she said, gently caressing his cheek, "I'm really fine."

He looked up at her, worry etched in his face.

"I buried those ghosts along with the pain a long time ago," she prodded. "I won't leave."

His smile was languid but seemed to drop the subject. Grissom wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her to him, but saying nothing. Sara melted into his body, welcoming the warmth emanating from his body and the assuring silence that clothed them.

That night, after a bout of lovemaking and a quick shower, they were on their sides facing each other on the bed. As Grissom had expected, Sara had a nightmare again. She was mumbling incoherent words as she usually did. He decided not to wake her this time, letting the bad dream pass. He watched a frown forming on her face and her lips parting, still murmuring softly in her deep sleep. He sighed deeply and gently stroked her arm.

"Nthin hpend…"

Grissom's eyes widened in surprise. His caresses stopped and he stared at Sara's sleeping form.

"Nutin hapend…"

The creases in her frown deepened as she continued muttering words in her sleep.

"Ts you… Rn-ngh—"

Grissom moved closer, trying to decipher Sara's words.

"Its Bast-hnng… You're sik… Rold—…"

Sara's eyes were squeezed shut and Grissom felt the muscles in her arm tense.

"Ronald Bst-hmm… Doit already."

Suddenly, Sara's whole body jerked, waking her up. She was severely shaking and tears started running down her face. Grissom's instant reaction was to wrap his arms around her and whispered soothing words to comfort her. He immediately felt regret that he had not woken her up before the scenes in her dreams had gotten worse. But if he did, he would not have any clues as to what was plaguing her every night during her sleep.

" _Ronald,"_ he kept the name in mind.

It was a while before her breathing returned to normal and for her tremor to finally subside. It took a little while longer before her breathing became deep and regular suggesting she was again asleep. Grissom shifted a little, finding his chest and shoulder damp with her tears but ignored it. He continued to stroke Sara's hair and held her close as he then drifted to sleep shortly afterward.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: As much as this chapter tells one of the happiest days in Sara's life, I felt really lonely writing this. But I feel really proud of this chapter. Thank you for following this story! Enjoy!

Certain dialogues are taken from 13x15 Forget Me Not

Disclaimer: Still do not own them

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The topic about nightmares was not brought up over the next few days. Grissom did not tell Sara that she started muttering words in her sleep, sometimes coherent while most are not. One thing was consistent though—the name Ronald. However, he did not wait for the dreams to get worse like what happened before. When Grissom noticed that her muscles start to tense or her head slightly thrashes against the pillow, he would immediately wrap her in his arms and whisper words of comfort that slowly lulled her back to deep sleep.

Grissom conjectured that her dreams were not about different cases as it involved of only one name. Unfortunately, he does not know any Ronald in Sara's life. She had not mentioned anyone bearing that name to him that had been close to her. He speculated that a certain Ronald must have had an impact in Sara's life. How else would he be a constant figure in her dreams? But it might have been dreadful events though since the ending to her dreams seemed not pleasant at all.

All these theories are continuously swirling around Grissom's thoughts. But today, he would not confront Sara anything about her nightmares. He would not want her dealing with anything that might ruin this wonderful day—her birthday.

He planned the whole day ahead of them starting with a breakfast in bed then Sara had Grissom as dessert afterwards (that was unplanned). After a quick shower, they headed down to the beach where Grissom dared Sara to prove that she still has her surfing skills intact. She was reluctant at first, telling him that it had been a long time since she had surfed. But after several minutes of insistence on Grissom's part, she agreed and did not disappoint. After spending their whole morning on the beach, they ate lunch at a vegetarian place nearby. Afterwards, they went to one of their favorites in San Francisco, the Botanical Garden, and checked out the new additions to the arboretum. Then they strolled around the park, hands intertwined with each other, and waited for the sunset. They had a picture with the bridge on the background, illuminated by the orange skies and descending sun, 'just for the memory it.'

They went home, shared a bath, dressed up fancy, and had their dinner at one of the Italian restaurants that Sara loved. She was even offered a cake on the house. The day was perfect and she could not ask for a better one. Most importantly, she celebrated it with her husband. Her birthday ended with another round of lovemaking.

As Grissom lined up at her entrance, wet and very much ready for him, he looked deeply into her eyes which reflected only of love, burning passion, and want. He could not believe that even after all these years of familiarity with their bodies, they still get that intense pleasure even from the simplest of caresses, soft brushes of their lips, and slightest friction of skin against skin.

Sara brushed her hand over his now clean-shaven face upwards to his temple, faintly glistening with thin sheet of sweat, before tangling it with the curls at the back of his head. Grissom hovered above her with his arms supporting his weight, enveloping her whole body with his warmth. His eyes ran over the small faded scar on her right forehead. She mentioned to him before that she got that when a bullet grazed her head while on a case years ago. He softly kissed the barely visible line and gazed upon her bright eyes, flushed cheeks, and swollen lips.

"I must have done something right in my past life to deserve someone like you," he said, his voice only a whisper.

Before she could retort his statement, about to say something regarding him not believing in past lives, he leaned into her and kissed her tenderly, his tongue swiping at her bottom lip. She parted her lips and once again reveled in his taste. He slowly moved to kiss and lick the skin at her jawline down to her neck and collarbone before moving upwards to suck her earlobe. She hitched a breath at the sensation and she felt getting wetter between her thighs which added to the arousing feeling of the head of his penis parting her slick, throbbing entrance.

With one sliding motion, he entered her, eliciting both a loud moan from her and a groan from him.

"God, you feel so good!" he exclaimed as he started pumping into her, stimulated by the feel of her breasts against his chest, her breathy moans against his ear, and nails slowly digging into his back. He thrusted harder and faster, a bead of sweat on his forehead dropped to her cheek. Then he lowered a hand in between them and rubbed a finger against her sensitive nub which made Sara shudder and cried out his name in pleasure.

Her back arched upward and her hips started to fall out of rhythm as he gradually felt her muscles tightening around him as the wave of her orgasm started to pulse through her and he groaned. He continued his thrusts and his release came shortly afterward. They rode each other until their orgasm died down, aftershocks rippling around him.

They both opened their eyes, feeling satiated, sharing a gentle kiss.

"I love you, Gil."

"Love you, too, honey."

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 _Sara opened her eyes and found herself in familiar surroundings. The blue walls and clear glass doors that she was well acquainted with through years of working there were right before her eyes. She had no doubt that she was back at the Las Vegas Crime Lab. Without warning, familiar feelings of frustration, budding anger, and intense loneliness also washed over her. The same feelings she had at_ _ **that**_ _particular time._

" _Nothing happened!" she repeatedly said. To Crawford, Morgan, Hodges, Finn, DB, and to her close friends, Nick and Greg._

 _What does she have to do to make them believe her?_

" _It was Ronald! Ronald Basderic!"_

 _Images of her friends' faces surrounded her, clearly showing the look of judgment on them._

" _Nothing happened!" she reiterated, this time with more force. "He's setting me up! You've got to believe me!"_

 _She was now shouting at the top of her lungs. It's as if they are not hearing her. Finally, she put up her hands up in surrender and walked out, the ghosts of her friends' faces still haunting her. She walked up to a door, and when she opened it, Sara found herself at a darkened living room standing face-to-face with a familiar, nefarious figure in front of her. She felt the cold texture of a gun in her hands, pointed at the other person, ready to shoot._

" _Basderic," she quietly said._

 _A familiar conversation took place._

" _What do you want?" he asked._

" _You made me do this," Sara heard herself say, feeling pure anger welling up inside of her. "You discredit me at my job. You got me arrested. You go after my mother! You have ruined so many lives and now I'm going to ruin yours!"_

 _She pulled the trigger of her gun but surprised that it did not fire at all._

" _Don't bother," he said, "I removed the firing pin. When I was in your house."_

 _She was not surprised at all by his statement. But when she saw that he pulled out his own gun and pointed it at her, she knew she was now in deep shit._

" _You planned all of these. Right down to this minute," finally realizing what was happening._

" _Well, at least now you can appreciate what I went through. Did you even notice? Seven stab wounds! Just like your mother stabbed your father."_

" _You're sick, Ronald!" she interjected, a tear running down her eye._

" _I watched you, Sara. I read your e-mails. I witnessed your adolescent groping outside the bar." He moved closer to her, aiming the gun straight. "And now I get to kill you."_

 _She moved even closer, deciding to give up this fight, "Just do it already."_

 _Then she closed her eyes and heard shots, her body jerking to its sounds. As she opened her eyes, she found that she had no wounds, knowing somehow that she had not been hit at all. Instead, she was back at her house in Vegas, alone, along with the excruciating feeling of loneliness that has been with her from the start. She was seated at her couch in the living room, an opened envelope at the center table with its contents placed in her hand. Her heart filled with dread as she lowered her eyes to the papers that she was holding. Tears flowed down her eyes as she saw signed documents from Grissom asking her for a divorce. Then, a ring from her phone distracted her from her melancholic mood and found her husband's name at the caller ID._

 _She sighed quietly, "Don't leave me, Gil."_

 _Then she sniffed before swiping the green button and put the phone in her ear._

"Sara," he called, "Sara, wake up!"

Grissom shook her again, this time successfully causing her to open her eyes with tears streaking down her face.

"Gil," she called in disbelief, "You're here."

"Of course, I'm here. You're safe now."

Then another batch of tears welled up and flowed down freely on her cheeks. He pulled her to him, wrapped her in his arms, and whispered words of comfort.

"I will not leave you, Sara. It's okay. You're safe now." He tried to reassure her while gently stroking her arms and back and every now and then pressing his lips to her forehead.

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The couple slept with Sara's back leaning into Grissom's chest. She was spooned against him while his face was buried in her hair. His arms wrapped around her and she snugly fit into his embrace. The night was quiet until Sara started tensing up again in her sleep. At first, Grissom did not wake up. But after a slight thrashing of her head, he was disturbed by the movement, causing him to open his eyes and slowly stirring from his slumber.

"Sara?" he called out to her, his voice groggy and full of sleep.

Once he realized what was happening, he got up and leaned on his elbow, rolling Sara on her back. He could see mixed feelings of pain and anger etched on her face. Then she started muttering words once again.

"Nutin hapnngh…" she exclaimed through her parted lips. "Ts Ronald… Bstenghh…"

He saw her eyes shut tightly and her fists clenched until her knuckles turned white. Grissom was now worried.

"Hngggh…" Sara's head thrashed with more force than before.

Grissom tried to wake her up. "Sara. Sara, wake up," he called out to her but she didn't budge.

"Ur sik Rhnahld…" Tears were now rolling down her face.

Grissom now shook her, now desperate to wake her. Still, no response. "Sara!"

"Jus doit hng-redy…"

Then Sara's body jerked. But the thrashing stopped. Her muscles in her arms and fists relaxed. The emotion on her face was now blank. Still, she did not wake.

"Sara," Grissom breathed.

A frown formed on her face and more tears spilled down her closed eyes.

"Don't leave me, Gil," she whispered, as clear as he had heard it.

Grissom stopped, surprised to hear his name, the whole statement, come out of her lips. It was the first time she mentioned his name in her sleep. And the way that it was said pained him, like he had caused Sara misery in her dream.

"Sara," he called again, louder this time. "Sara, wake up!"

He shook her and finally relieved to see her eyes open after a while.

"Gil. You're here." She had said, sounding like he had indeed left her in her dream.

Grissom hugged her tight and soothed her while she continued to cry hysterically in his arms.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I am sorry it took longer than expected to post this next chapter and forgive me if it's too short. We're nearing the end. Thank you for following the story! I really appreciate it.

Here goes! Grissom gets some help. Can you guess from where? Or from whom?

Disclaimer: Still do not own them

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The couple were eating their breakfast the next day, the atmosphere discomfiting and uneasy, when Grissom decided to finally address the elephant in the room.

"Honey, you told me you were okay," he turned to Sara, putting his unfinished crossword puzzle and his reading glasses down.

"I am," she answered him, not looking at his eyes.

"What about last night?"

"I told you, it's just the past cases that got to me before," shoving a mouthful of pancake with its syrup dripping to the side of her mouth. She wished they would not have this conversation right now. She tried to chew slowly to stall but was unsuccessful as she swallowed the last bit of her food while she waited for her husband to speak.

"But it got worse!" Grissom could not hide the frustration in his voice. "I know it's not—"

"It's nothing, Gil!" Sara put her fork down with such force that it made a clinking sound against the table. "Leave it alone!"

Grissom stared at her, wide-eyed.

As soon as she realized her reaction, she composed herself. "I'm sorry. I did not mean to get mad like that." She sighed. "I just wish you drop it."

They continued on with their breakfast wrapped in awkward silence. As they finished eating, Sara stood up and gathered the dishes, bringing it to the kitchen sink. Grissom stood up with her and followed her. He broke the silence.

"Who's Ronald?"

Sara suddenly stopped and tensed. Then recovering quickly, she said nothing and continued on her task. But of course, that nonverbal response was not lost on Grissom. He walked closer to her.

"Sara, who's Ronald?" he asked again.

"I don't know who you're talking about."

"I know he's the one in your dreams."

This time, Sara completely stopped in her task and faced Grissom, looking slightly surprised to have been found out.

"You talk in your sleep, dear," he continued, "and you say that name in every dream that you had."

Her eyes slightly watered and she sniffed. He knew he hit a chord. "I don't want to talk about it."

"But you've got to tell me, Sara. If it's bothering you enough that it gives you nightmares then it worries me a lot."

"I… I'm not…" She looked down.

"Sara…"

After a long pause, she finally met his gaze. "I can't, Gil. I know it has been bothering me for a long time but… I can't tell you right now."

He sighed deeply, shaking his head. He just could not understand why she would not tell him.

"But I will," Sara pressed on. "Give me time."

Sighing again, he nodded weakly, and reluctantly dropped the subject.

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Grissom stared out into the lake enveloped by lush trees and shrubs in front of him, appreciating the calmness of his surroundings, only the cacophony of birds and insects heard in the background. There were a few people scattered around him but he did not pay attention to them. He was in his own world buried in his own musings.

He was currently in the park, giving himself some time alone, to ponder about what was really going on with Sara. He told her that morning after breakfast that he was going to the post office to mail some documents to Larry and will go grocery shopping after. Sara easily acquiesced, thinking the space might also be good for the two of them at the moment. But after sending his mail, he did not go to the grocery store. Instead, he went straight to the park and walked for several minutes before settling down on a bench he was now sitting on.

He sighed heavily while unconsciously twisting his wedding band around his ring finger. He looked down at his other hand, his phone balancing on his fingers. He was debating something in his head. But after a moment of deep thought, weighing in between the pros and cons, he finally held his phone, looked for a certain number in the contacts list and pressed the call button.

After a few rings, a familiar voice answered.

"Sanders."

"Greg… It's Grissom."

The younger man's disbelief was evident in his voice. "Grissom! This is a surprise. What can I help you with?" But before Grissom could answer, Greg suddenly interrupted him, "Is Sara alright?"

"Sara's fine. She's…doing fine."

"Oh. So why did you call?"

"Actually, I have a question."

"Okay. Shoot."

Grissom answered without preamble. "Back when Sara was still in Vegas with you, did someone by the name of Ronald become close with her or played any significant role in her life?"

"Ronald?"

"Yeah."

"I don't know any Ronald related to Sara. As far as I know, you are the only male family member she had. She rarely made acquaintances outside of work." Greg snickered. "She didn't go on dates. I'm pretty sure she was still hung up on you even when you guys parted ways though she won't talk about it. Well, except for that –"

There was a pause noting Greg's hesitance.

"Greg?"

"Ronald? You mean Ronald Basderic?"

' _Bast-hnng...'_ Grissom finally remembering that garbled word. ' _Basderic!'_

"That's it! Basderic!"

Another pause. "Sara has not told you about Basderic?"

"Apparently not. Greg, who's that guy?"

"You've got to talk to Sara about this. If she didn't tell you, obviously this is something you have to deal with between yourselves."

"But, Greg, she won't talk to me. I know something's wrong. She doesn't even know that I called you."

"Yeah. Listen, Griss—"

"You were the one with Sara all these years when she still worked in Vegas. And you're still a CSI there. I know you've got to know something."

"But—"

"I'm desperate," Grissom pleaded.

There was a deep sigh at the other line. "Sara's going to kill me!"

Grissom let out a heavy breath. "Please, Greg."

After a few seconds, "Okay. But promise me you're not going to tell her that I told you."

"You have my word."

There was a heavy silence that followed. Grissom braced himself for what he was about to hear.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Wow, I really love the concern and worry pouring in for Sara from our readers right now! Don't worry, guys, Grissom will do it right this time.

I call this chapter The Calm before the Storm. Thank you and enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI

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"Basderic was a suspect accused of murder and framing one of our CSIs for it," Greg stated as his introduction.

Grissom put it together. "Sara."

"Yes. Well, he was a stalker who went after a woman who worked at Frank's Diner. You know, the place we used to get together?"

Grissom grunted, hinting that he remembered the place.

Greg continued. "Due to his obsession, the girl ended up dead, got caught up in a shooting incident. And Sara stood up to Basderic, saying that he's the reason the girl died. Basderic took the blow to his ego very seriously because after months of planning, he framed Sara for a murder that, of course, she didn't commit."

Grissom kept quiet, listening intently.

"But there was a great amount of evidence against her at that time, you know. We really had a hard time finding other pieces of evidence that would exonerate her. And Sara was a complete mess. We had no idea what she was going through. She kept it all to herself."

"What are you talking about?" Grissom asked, now lost in the conversation.

"Grissom," the young man answered, "all these happened on her birthday. The night you were supposed to have dinner to celebrate…"

The former supervisor felt goosebumps creep up on his arms. Now he tried to recall that event years ago. He remembered a dinner reservation they both made at the Mediterranean Hotel at that time to celebrate Sara's birthday. But all he did was sent her a text message. He did not show up because a few weeks before, he—

"When you failed to show up," Greg's voice broke through the receiver, breaking his thoughts for a second, "she was approached by a man, spent the night talking to her, and ended up dead the next day. All evidence pointed to her as the main suspect since she spent a long time in his hotel room. And she didn't even say anything. She didn't tell us that you guys…"

—he sent her divorce papers.

"…split up."

' _Don't leave me, Gil,'_ she had said in her sleep.

Grissom felt an intense ache in his chest and closed his eyes as realization dawned on him. As he opened his eyes, he shook his head.

"And you can't imagine the looks… the stares…" At this point, Greg's voice faltered. "I mean, everyone seems to be having the same thought against her. That… that she…"

"They thought she cheated on me," Grissom quietly finished the sentence for him, pain etched in his features.

"Yeah," Greg's voice turned melancholic, "She really struggled, Grissom. She took pills because she was having trouble sleeping at night."

Grissom let out a frustrated breath, running his hands through his hair and across his face.

"Basderic stalked her for months. Read her e-mails. Followed her without her knowing it. Then broke into your home using your security code..."

Grissom's eyes widened in shock at his last statement.

"…Even went to her mother—"

"Wait, what?!" Grissom interrupted, "Something happened to Laura?"

"No. He only visited her. Said something about Sara that shook her. But she's okay."

"Oh my God," Grissom huffed a breath, disbelieving all that he was hearing right now.

"Then Basderic beat himself up and tried to convince us that Sara assaulted her," Greg continued. "Served her a TRO. Turned out that his grand plan was not to lock her up in jail for the murder but to kill her in self-defense." He quickly added, "Don't worry. We intercepted him then before doing any more harm to Sara."

Grissom stayed quiet.

"Hey, come to think of it," Greg's voice broke through as he realized something, "it was this same time that year! Yeah, it was her birthday."

A heavy silence hovered between the two. Grissom pondered about the coincidence that she started having nightmares about the past at the same time this year.

Greg was the first one to break the silence. "I'm sorry, Grissom."

"I think I know now where your indifference came from when I was in Vegas last year," the older man stated with a mirthless chuckle.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry about that."

"Don't be."

"Well, you had your own problems. Who knows what you had gone through before deciding to split up," Greg retorted.

Grissom smiled at how Greg has matured. "But now knowing what happened, I think I still deserved your cold treatment."

"Yeah, well. Kind of," the younger man said, feeling ambivalent. "And with you taking it easy with Lady Heather in front of Sara at that time." Grissom imagined him shaking his head at the other end of the line. "But it's the past, Grissom. I'm sure even Sara has moved on from that."

However, Grissom still could not move on from Basderic.

"Greg, I have one last request to ask of you. And I admit that this is not easy."

"What is it?"

"I want you to send the case files to me," Grissom replied in a tone like the thing he was asking for was only simple.

Greg's shocked voice resonated through the phone. "Grissom, you know that's illegal! You're not in law enforcement anymore. I can get imprisoned by that!"

"Nobody has to know!" Grissom interjected. "I'll give you a secure IP address that you can access—"

"No! I can't break the law! I… I can't break Sara's trust." Greg turned quiet at the other end.

Grissom understood what Greg was currently feeling at the moment. Sending him the case report would let him know what happened right down to the minute details. The younger man might have felt that he would be betraying Sara if he did what he requested. Especially now that Greg knew she was keeping mum about this to her own husband. But Grissom was also adamant to know what really happened.

"Look, she doesn't have to know. I won't tell it's you. And I promise I'll delete the address and all the files right after."

"But she'll figure it out," he snapped back.

Grissom let out a soft sigh. "Please, Greg. I got to know."

A pregnant pause followed before Grissom's pleading voice broke through his hesitation and Greg finally let out his own sigh, "Okay."

"Thank you. I really appreciate it," Grissom remarked.

"Yeah, sure. Tell Sara I said 'Hi and Happy birthday!' when you get caught," Greg answered in jest earning a snicker from Grissom.

"Oh, and Greg?" He cut through before his former subordinate hung up.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you…for not giving up on Sara," the older man commented, his voice with a tinge of dejection.

"Of course, Grissom," Greg replied, smiling through the phone as he remembered the same sentiment that his friend had been grateful for years ago, "She's family."

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Later that evening, Sara dreaded that the topic about Basderic might be brought up again when Grissom finally came back. But when he walked through the door bearing three fully occupied paper bags in his arms, he went straight to the kitchen and sorted out stuff he bought from the grocery store. He was strangely quiet like he was left alone in his own world.

When he finished his task at the kitchen, Grissom walked up to her and suddenly wrapped her in a warm embrace. Sara was actually taken aback at his gesture; nevertheless, she hugged him back. When he pulled back to look at her, he looked like he had aged a bit.

"What's wrong?" she immediately asked, worry evident in her voice.

"Nothing," he shook his head. "I'm sorry, Sara."

"For what?"

"Everything."

She let out a small sigh, not understanding what her husband was trying to say. However, she was really concerned on the way he was acting at the moment. She just pulled him back to her, stroking his back and his hair. Something must have happened while he was out.

"There's nothing to forgive, dear," she whispered into his ear, "You didn't do anything wrong." She then pulled back and looked at Grissom's woeful gaze, "I should be the one who's sorry. For my outburst this morning—"

Grissom placed a finger on her lips to stop her from talking. "Don't worry about it." Then he kissed her fully on the lips, giving away every emotion that he felt, eliciting a small whimper from her. Then pulling back from her and his features lightening up a bit, he held her hands, "Come, I'll make dinner." He gave her a soft smile.

Sara pursed her lips and smiled. She went with him to the kitchen, a little relieved that her husband recovered from his melancholic mood. Yet, she still felt something has changed within him as he came back from his errand but chose to enjoy the peace at the moment.

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A/N2: You think Grissom's going to let her off the hook that easily? Let me hear about your thoughts.

I know the episode Forget Me Not was not aired in September but I would like to keep the storyline in line with the character's biography, hence, Sara's dreams occurring in September which is really her birth month. I think it was a lapse on the writers' part to not consider that fact while writing that particular episode.

Last one or two chapters more to go!


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: I'm glad that you all agree with me (so far) with Greg being the perfect candidate to tell Grissom all that happened when he was not around. I thought very long and hard about it and I believe the previous chapter came out pretty well.

So on to the next chapter. I thought of dividing this into two parts but it just did not sit right with me so I guess I just have to post a very long one and get it over with. This is the moment you have all been waiting for—the confrontation. Thanks for following! Don't be shy to let me hear your two cents worth! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI

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After their dinner, they went to their shared office to continue working on their assigned tasks. Sara was the first one to go to bed with Grissom staying behind, saying that he still has to finish a research document that Larry had asked to do for him.

The truth is he already finished that paper days ago. It was what he mailed to Larry that morning. After half an hour had passed and he was sure that Sara was already asleep in the adjacent room, Grissom opened a site on his laptop and entered an IP address. There, he accessed his mail and found the attached files that Greg sent to him earlier. After downloading the files, he erased the e-mail, even in its history so that it cannot be tracked, and finally trashed the IP address, accomplishing part of what he promised to his former CSI.

He then readied himself and opened the folder containing several files. He saw pictures of Taylor Wynard, Ronald Basderic, and Sara in an orange prison uniform. He let out a heavy breath and calmed himself a bit since he realized that his pulse rate had slightly increased. Then he started reading the detailed case report.

Grissom sorted through different pictures of the crime scene and the victim's body with its autopsy report.

' _Seven stab wounds?! With no defensive wounds at all?'_ he pondered. _'Was this all about rage?'_

He went through each piece of evidence like he was back in Vegas working as a CSI, scrutinizing and double checking as if he was the lead on the case. As he read the case report, he referenced it with the pictures to better visualize what had happened chronologically.

Her fingerprints on the wine glass. Her phone records. Spending time in the victim's room longer than she admitted. Her intoxication. Her necklace at his room. Her hair in his shower drain. The missing murder weapon later found in her dishwasher at their house.

' _Greg was right,'_ Grissom thought to himself, _'The evidence piled up was enough to incriminate Sara.'_

Then they processed her as she was caught on tape "assaulting" Basderic and was served a temporary restraining order. Grissom conjectured what her co-workers might have thought this time and it was dreadful. Worse, what those people close to her might have thought of her at that time.

' _Nothing happened,'_ she would always repeat in her sleep, the incoherent words becoming more understandable. He let out a weary sigh as he felt the pain and frustration that he believed that his wife also went through at that moment.

Then he read the part when things took a turn for the better. No hints of trace of Basderic on Sara negating the former's assault statement. The override access on her keycard. Her sleeping pills being tampered with. The switching of shower drain covers between Sara's and Wynard's rooms. Finally, the surveillance tapes placing Basderic on the murder scene at the right place and time.

But what caught Grissom's attention more was when he read the part when Sara went to Basderic's house, with a little help from Nick and Crawford, finally confronting her stalker. She pointed her gun at him and fired, but learned that he had removed the firing pin when he was at their house. After that, he gradually confessed all that he planned to destroy her life.

"… _You planned all of these right down to this minute right here."_ Sara's voice resonated as Grissom listened to the recorded message.

" _Well, at least now you can appreciate what I went through. The months of planning. The attention to detail. Did you even notice? Seven stab wounds. I stabbed him seven times just like your mother stabbed your father."_

" _You're sick, Ronald."_ Grissom closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, slightly shaking his head.

" _I watched you, Sara. I read your e-mails. I witnessed your adolescent groping outside the bar. You know I had to pay Taylor to meet you at the hotel. I told him we were friends, that I didn't want you to spend your birthday by yourself. I even sprung for the desert."_

A short pause. Then Basderic's voice continued, _"And now I get to kill you."_

" _Just do it already."_

Grissom flinched at the three shots that were clearly heard through the recording. He sat there, wide-eyed at the screen with his mouth slightly open, struggling to hear for voices.

And when Sara's voice broke through, _"You're done, Ronald. This time for real,"_ Grissom let out a deep sigh of relief and the recording ended. He then read in the case file that Basderic's ammunition was replaced with blanks and Grissom was feeling eternally grateful for that.

After an hour and a half of poring over the files and photos, he let out a heavy sigh. He now knew of his wife's heartbreak. How she struggled and continued on with work while going through their divorce without anyone knowing. At the same time, she had a madman to deal with in addition to her marital problems. A psycho who tainted Sara's record, played with her feelings, and even involved her mother. One who almost killed her. And he had no idea what had happened. All these because he had decided for them to part ways. And he thought he only did what was best for her at that time.

' _Don't leave me, Gil,'_ she murmured in her sleep.

Feeling a constricting pain in his chest once again, he removed his glasses and ran his hand across his face, looking forlorn with his head bowed down. He was so deep in his thoughts that he had not heard his wife stand by the door to their office.

"Hey," her voice soft, catching his attention.

Grissom looked up with tired eyes, startled, and closed his laptop. He gave her a weak smile.

"Hey," he greeted back, "You can't sleep?"

"I slept but I woke up to find that you're still not in bed."

The despondent look on his face laced with fatigue was not lost on her and she immediately walked up to his side, sat on the chair beside him, and put a hand on his cheek.

"Honey, what's wrong?" she asked, caressing his cheek with her thumb, feeling the roughness of his faint stubble against her finger.

He kept his gaze at her and asked, pain evident in his voice, "Why didn't you tell me about Ronald Basderic?"

Sara's eyes widened in shock and suddenly withdrew her hand from his face as if she was burnt by a hot object.

"How did you know that name?" were the only words she could muster.

Grissom ran his hands over his hair in frustration, leaving unruly curls in their wake. "Come on, Sara. I know he's the one in your nightmares. Why didn't you tell me about Basderic? Wasn't he worth mentioning to me? Of how he almost destroyed your career? How he almost killed you?"

"How did you…?" Sara stood up, walking a few steps away from him. Suddenly, realization dawned on her. "It was Greg, wasn't it? Greg told you!"

"I had to ask him, Sara. Because you wouldn't tell me anything!" Grissom also stood up from his chair.

"I didn't want to tell you, Gil! I didn't want you to know!" She raised her hands up in frustration. "It was years ago, alright? Let's just move on!"

Grissom was taken aback with her admission. But he would not simply back down.

His brows furrowing, he asked, "Why?"

Sara let out a frustrated sigh and immediately knew that he would not let this go unless he got his answers. She shook her head and said nothing, not meeting his gaze.

"Was it because it was the time I sent you those divorce papers?"

She looked up at him and by the look on her face, he knew his target was spot on. Through several years of being together, even apart most of the time, they became accustomed to each other's mannerisms and simple gestures that her defensive stance and the frown she was now wearing spoke volumes.

"It was, wasn't it?" He took a step forward but still keeping a safe distance between them. Her eyes were now welling up. But still, she kept quiet. "Sara, he stalked you. He knew about our marital problems and took advantage of that to get to you." Then his voice faltered and he dropped his gaze, "I made matters worse for you. And I had no idea what happened."

Her brows wrinkled and she walked up to him, placing his hands on his slumped shoulders, "It wasn't your fault, dear." She reached a hand up to his face and turned his gaze on her, "Never ever blame yourself."

She then guided him back to their chairs and sat down facing each other. Grissom kept silent, waiting for Sara to say something. He looked up at her and saw her gaze into the space in front of her then she spoke quietly.

"You were right." She sniffled. "It was the most depressing time of my life. I can't bring myself to talk about it because it hurt too much."

Grissom said nothing, encouraging her to go on.

"I had these nightmares at this time of the year every time since that incident. Don't get me wrong, I _had_ moved on. But it seemed that my subconscious is there to remind me of that depressing moment through my dreams. It spontaneously goes away as the month ends." She let out a cheerless snicker, "It's just unfortunate that it's my birth month." She met his gaze. "I thought that I wouldn't have those dreams since I'm now with you again." Then she dropped her gaze, her voice quiet, "I guess I was wrong."

He held out his hand and covered hers, "You could have just told me about it, honey. I know we are in the process of reworking through our marriage. And one of our main problems even back then was communication. Or a lack thereof."

She looked up at him.

"I…I know I'm one to talk," he continued, "but I'm trying, Sara. We vowed that we would not repeat the same mistakes that led to our failed marriage. So I'm going to do everything in my power to make it work this time."

She pursed her lips and squeezed his hand. He was right. They were given another chance that others were unlucky to have.

"You're right," she agreed with a nod of her head. "I know I should have told you. But it just hits a sensitive spot for me that I'd rather forget about it than relive it."

Keeping her hand on his, he silently offered her support.

"Basderic was a sick psychopath who had no regard for human emotions even though he claimed to have one."

"Greg told me about the girl in Frank's Diner."

"He may deny it all he wants but he really was the reason Edie got caught up in that shooting incident and died," she seethed, her emotions becoming raw as she remembered the scene.

"And you pointed that out to him," he stated, "A little too strongly for his taste, I heard."

"He didn't like the blow to his ego. And my life was the payback."

"I believe it was not only your life that he tried to take, Sara. He tried to ruin your credibility and your work ethics. Had the gall to break into our house and then went to meet your mother. I mean, it took a lot of planning on his part just to take you down."

"Wow, Greg sure did tell you a comprehensive gist. But yeah, he went to great lengths to bring me down."

"He must have done a lot of digging on you. I mean, I didn't even know about the specifics of your father's death. And that psychopath stabbed the victim as your mother had done to your father."

"How did you know?" A guilty look was reflected on his face as she was able to grasp the situation. "You went through the case files?!"

The look on his face gave him away.

She retracted her hand, stood up, and walked backwards from him, keeping a great deal of distance between them. "Jesus, Gil! I keep something from you about my life and you go against the odds, and the law, just to get your answers!"

"I wanted to know everything, Sara!" He also stood up from his chair and gesturing his hands in front of him, defending his actions. "And he has done horrific things to you. I can only imagine what you've been through. And now I understand."

"You shouldn't have! You have no right to know about the case!"

"Why not?!" Unable to control his outburst, Grissom threw his hands up in the air. "I'm your goddamned husband for Christ's sake! I deserved to know what the hell happened to my wife!" Then he looked at her in accusation. "Or is it because I chose to leave you that time, is that it? In your point of view, I abandoned you at that moment so I have no right to know what happened. Is that it?!"

Tears streaked down her face. She looked away from him, shook her head and she whispered, "No."

"Then why?" he questioned, a look of frustration on his face. But Sara said nothing and turned her back away from him.

' _Sara wouldn't be so obstinate to not tell me about this,'_ Grissom was now lost in his thoughts. _'I mean, all this information about Basderic was worth mentioning to me! What could possibly have happened that time that she wouldn't want me to know? Unless—'_ His line of thought suddenly stopped. He looked up at her, his view of her back to him, shaking with sobs every now and then.

He took two steps towards her and calmly asked, "It's about Taylor Wynard, isn't it?"

She turned around, meeting his concerned gaze, unable to speak. Her eyes were starting to have red tinges from excessing crying with her nose and cheeks following suit.

He continued, "You are feeling guilty about the pictures."

"You saw them?" she asked with dread but already knowing the answer.

"Yes."

Another batch of tears fell across Sara's face as she tightly shut her eyes. "I'm sorry," was all she said as she put her face in her hands and her body wracked with sobs.

Realization flooded through Grissom as he walked up to her and wrapped her tightly in his arms. He gently stroked her hair, the collar of his shirt becoming wet with her tears. "Oh honey," he calmed her with his soothing voice, "It's okay. I don't judge you for what you did with him. We were separated. I couldn't blame you for that."

She shook her head on his shirt, her arms limp at her sides. "It doesn't matter. I still did it."

"Shhh… It's okay."

She pulled back from his embrace and wiped her tears with her fingers. "I couldn't remember who initiated what but I really felt awful afterwards. It felt like betraying you, like I was cheating on you even though you already sent me those papers at that time." She sniffed. "I stopped him before anything else happened. And God knows the self-pity and loathing I felt afterwards."

Grissom put his hands on her face, still a little damp from her tears, and gazed at her chocolate orbs, "Sweetheart, you don't have to be so hard on yourself. It was years ago and I reiterate that we were separated at that time. I'd be lying if I'd say that it didn't hurt but…" He tilted his face and dropped his gaze, "I…I understand your need for physical gratification. So I could not blame you whether or not something happened."

"It's not about physical gratification, Gil." She sniffed again, thankful that her tears stopped, and made him look at her. "I really missed you. So much that it hurts." She creases between her eyebrows deepened as she reminisced the feeling. She put a hand on his cheek. "And when I kissed him, all I could think about was you. I pictured you kissing me. With all the alcohol in my system that time, it was not hard to do." She put her other hand above his. "But it felt different. It was not you. And that brought me back to my senses. Nothing happened, I swear."

He gave her a warm smile, reassuring her, "Shh… I believe you."

Grissom leaned into her, brushing his lips against hers and giving her a long, languorous kiss, tasting the salt on her lips. As he flickered his tongue across her bottom lip to taste more of the salty tears admixed with her own sweetness, she groaned and deepened the kiss.

Sara pulled back and slowly opened her eyes, "Yeah, it didn't feel like that. At all."

Grissom chuckled and pulled her back into his embrace. "We are together now. You have got to stop feeling guilty about these things. None of it was your fault."

She wrapped her arms tightly around his back.

"And I feel a little bit happy and relieved that you felt awful," he added with a small smile.

She broke from his embrace and looked at him, wide-eyed, sighing dramatically. But she laughed and gently slapped his forearm.

After a short pause, he broke the silence. "That's why Basderic killed Wynard." Grissom stated, putting the pieces together. "Forgive me for being blunt, but I wondered that if he wanted revenge, why didn't he just kill you? Or your mother? With the same number of stab wounds?" He narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips. "Then I realized he wanted to get to you. Tried to make a point. Wanted you to suffer. And then kill you."

"Oh, he got me, alright," Sara scoffed, unimpressed, "and I'm glad that son-of-a-bitch is serving his time where he belongs."

"That man is sick," he blurted out.

She crossed her arms across her chest in a protective stance. He walked closer to her and embraced her again, his strong arms providing safety and comfort. He kissed her forehead.

"I just wish you could have told me then." Grissom whispered through her hair. "Or somebody from the team sent me a heads up."

"Would that change things back then?" She looked up at his blue eyes, but appeared she was looking right through him.

He sighed heavily after pondering about it for a second. "I don't know. Maybe? Maybe not?" He shook his head in surrender. "At least, I can be there for you at that time."

She gave him a languid smile and wrapped her arms around his back. "It's okay," she comforted him, her breath warming his chest through the unbuttoned part of his shirt, "I'd rather hold on to this moment right now."

He again kissed her forehead. "How was your mother?"

"A little shaken up. Basderic told her that I stabbed a man seven times. Got her riled up so she got her hands on a bottle of alcohol and started drinking to oblivion. But she was fine when I checked on her."

"We should go visit her," he suggested, absently stroking her hair, "before we go back to the sea."

"Yeah?" she looked up at him, smiling her signature Sidle smile that melted his heart.

He tilted his head and smiled back, "Yeah."

They went back to their hugging position and enjoyed the comfortable silence.

After a short while, she broke through his musings, "You know, I kind of thought that it was a good thing that we were divorced back then."

He pulled back from her with a confused look, unsure of what he had just heard.

She continued, grazing her fingers across his rough stubble, "If we weren't, God knows what he would have done to you. Knowing him, he would have used you to get to me. And I wouldn't forgive myself if something would have happened to you because of me."

Grissom narrowed his eyes then gave her one of his crooked smiles. "I'd rather have suffered a great deal with you, Sara." He put a hand to her cheek and stroked it. "Compared to feeling shitty right now because of what happened and I was not even there. I'm really sorry."

She shook her head. "Don't be. I'm just glad that we're together. Right here. Right now. I still couldn't believe it until now."

"I know," he chuckled. "And I'm forever grateful for this chance to be with you and be here for you."

They shared a small kiss, brushing feathery light sensation on each other's lips. She pulled back and met his gaze, losing in his eyes as blue as the sea bringing up a sensation in her that she could drown in them.

"Thank you for not giving up on me…this time."

He gave her a gentle smile and leaned down on her, locking his lips with hers in a smoldering kiss. He entangled one hand across her hair and the other hand wrapped around her waist, pulling her strongly towards him. Her breath hitches at his forceful display of passion that she could not stop the moan escaping her throat. She met his tongue with equal thrusts and soon felt him groping along her back and butt to squeeze any flesh that he could find. When he placed his hands at the back of her thighs, she took it as an unspoken signal to hop a little to him and wrap her legs around his waist as he carried her to their bedroom while still nipping and kissing at the exposed flesh of her neck and chest. As she felt his arousal straining against his jeans, she moaned loudly this time at the different sensations that she was experiencing, excited at the prospect of being made love to in a few moments. They spent the next hour loving each other, whispering words of love and reassurance, until they both finally drifted off to a peaceful sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: And now we're down to our last chapter! I just want to thank you to all who followed and liked this story. Especially to all who left their reviews and messages. It was nice to hear your two cents worth. It means a lot to me, for someone who started writing again after a decade. Thank you guys!

Now that they cleared the air, it's time to move on. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything

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"Sanders."

"Hello, Greggo," Sara greeted as she smiled into the phone with that familiar tilt of her voice.

Greg's chuckle echoed through the other line and exclaimed, "Wow! I have not been called by that name in a long time!" which earned a giggly laughter from his friend.

"That's because Nick and I are not there to call you that," she teased.

He countered her statement, "For the record, it has been years since you both called me that."

"I guess you're right," she replied, the ghost of her smile still on her lips.

A little crestfallen, a deep sigh of surrender was let out at the other line. "I guess Grissom ratted me out, huh?"

Sara chuckled. "No, no. I figured it out."

"I told him that you would," he flatly pointed out. "Don't say I didn't warn him. I just wish I won't get much in trouble for it."

"Don't worry," she assured him, "all the files were deleted in his laptop and any history of files sent over the Internet are untraceable."

"I mean from you."

She let out an amused chuckle. "No, you're safe."

"That's a relief." There was a short pause. Then Greg broke the silence, "I'm really sorry, Sar. But I sensed his desperation."

She smiled and admired his loyalty. "It's okay. Don't worry about it."

"How are you doing?"

Her smile gradually faded. "I'm okay," she replied, her voice laced with sincerity.

"Why didn't you tell him about Basderic?"

She seemed to think about the answer before voicing it out. "I guess I was guilty about things. Which, of course, he understood and told me not to worry anymore about it. And it was so long ago, it never occurred to me that it still mattered. But since it happened at a significant time in my life, the pain never really went away. Until I had the chance to confront it with my husband. And now I feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest."

Greg kept silent, encouraging her to continue.

"And I wanted to protect him from the pain. I never wished for him to blame himself for what happened just because he took matters into his own hands for both of us back then."

"I really hope you're fine now," her friend wished, "You and Grissom both deserve happiness. This time, together, I hope?"

She laughed at his incertitude for their relationship. "Don't worry," she assuaged his fears, "We do not plan to separate again. In life. In work. Or in paper."

"I am so relieved to hear that," he answered, smiling at her reassurance, "Then I guess I don't have to worry."

"I really wanted to thank you though. For giving me a head start about this. I wouldn't have had the courage to tell Gil all about Basderic if you haven't given him the preliminaries."

"It was Grissom's persistence," he retorted. "He still gets me sometimes, you know."

She chortled. "Some things never change."

Greg's tone got serious. "He cares a lot about you, Sara. I mean, I know you've been through a lot of ups and downs in your relationship but I believe he loves you so much that he's willing to do anything to make you happy," he stated. "No matter how misguided he may be sometimes," he added, pertaining to their divorce which he thought was the biggest mistake Grissom ever made.

"I know that. And I love him, too."

"I know you do. Giving up your promotion on your first day was a proof of that," he snickered.

"And I _am_ happy. I've never been so happy in my life. And I won't let Basderic or any other bad memories take this away from me."

"I'm happy to know that," his grin evident in his voice.

"Thanks, Greg. I miss you."

"I miss you, too, Sara. Oh, and belated happy birthday."

"Thank you," she smiled. "Give my regards to the team."

"I sure will. Keep in touch more."

She laughed. "I will try."

She hung up the phone, placed it in her pocket, and stared into the distance. She looked at the rows of boats of different sizes, yachts, and ferryboats parked at the dock along with their boat that she was standing on right now. The afternoon sun was blazing right at them which made her squint her eyes and readjust the cap on her head. Numerous seagulls flew overhead with their cries drowning in her musings. The mild motion of the boat as it goes along the gentle waves lulls her deeply in her own thoughts as the gentle breeze blew in their direction.

She zipped her windbreaker up to her neck knowing the wind will shortly pick up its speed in a moment when they venture out again into the sea. Grissom was just about finishing double checking their equipment in the boat when he gave her a moment to wait before they pull up the anchor as he made necessary preparations before their departure. She chose that short minute to call her friend back in Vegas to express her gratitude.

She could not believe that a month has passed since they just got back from their adventure out at sea and parked out here at the docks. Sara finally came clean to Grissom about the Basderic incident which turned out pretty well from what she expected given her lapse of judgment with Wynard. Her bad dreams, as she has told Grissom, had decreased in frequency and had not been bothering her sleep for the past couple of nights. Who knows if it will recur next year? What's important was that she had her husband to comfort her like he always had even with her past nightmares without the guilt or pain chewing at her any longer.

As Grissom promised her, she got to visit Laura in Vegas at the last minute who was overwhelmed with joy at the sight of her daughter walking alongside her husband that she rarely saw. Sara thought that it might have brought her mother peace of mind knowing that her daughter was happy and doing well in her life despite her grave mistakes in the past.

It was only a shame that they have not gone and paid a visit to their friends at the Crime Lab due to time constraints considering they only drove the rest of the trip with making a few stops in between. But the couple actually even enjoyed the road trip going to Vegas and back to San Francisco, relishing the time spent to themselves and even making out in the car a couple of times in the middle of nowhere along the desert landscape. A particular guilty, and dirty, pleasure that they have not done in a very long time. She chuckled at the memory of the sensuous and passionate moments spent at the car, first on top of the fender along the passenger's side and the second in the back seat, that brought a shiver to her insides, making her cross her arms across her chest.

' _Who knew that people our age could still make out just as wildly as teenagers with raging hormones?'_ she thought as she snickered, bringing a smug smile to her face.

"Penny for your thoughts, dear?" Grissom broke through her musings, his gentle voice coming from behind her as he slid his arms around her waist which brought her another shiver.

Sara leaned into his warmth, grateful for the additional body heat, and covered his hands with hers. She erased the previous malicious images in her mind as she answered her husband, "I was just thinking what a memorable month we had. Reminds me of that famous phrase about leaving your heart in San Francisco."

"That phrase does hold true."

She stole a glance at him, "What do you mean?"

"Almost two decades ago, I left my heart here in San Francisco," he explained to her, "A certain hot brunette with long slender legs who attended my lecture at the Forensic Academy Conference stole it from me. And has been with her ever since."

Sara looked back up at him at smiled warmly. She put a hand around his head and stroked the soft curls at his nape that was not covered by his cap.

"You and your sweet words, Gil," she giggled.

"It's true, honey." He gave her a boyish grin making him look years younger that left her swooning on the inside.

"And you have mine. Always." She replied with her megawatt smile and looked back again into the distance, keeping her hand in his hair. "I will really miss this city."

"We could always come back here, you know," he offered, also empathizing with his wife's premature homesickness. "After six months or a year, I guess. But I'll make sure we will." He put a chaste kiss on her cheek and leaned his chin on her shoulder. "And don't worry about the house. It's safe and will be perfectly well-kempt in the hands of Christine and Mike." He chuckled. "I've given them specific instructions on how to maintain the garden. You know, to keep the insects and butterflies coming. And before you know it, we'll be back home."

Sara turned around in his arms, put her hands on each side of his face, and leaned in for a soft kiss. When she pulled back, she looked deeply into his blue orbs and gave him a wide reassuring smile, "I already am home."

He returned her smile and inclined his head to hers for another passionate kiss.

 **END**

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A/N: I thought it was nice to end this story with a little bit of Greg-Sara interaction. I liked their friendship—of how it evolved through the years in the series from a simple crush to respected coworkers and then, of course, as dependable friends. Just unfortunate though that Nick was not in the finale. I might have included him in this story if he was.

Hope you enjoyed this! Thank you!


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